Thursday, May 16, 2013

Mother's Day

Mother's Day is always one of those days I don't really look forward to. It is full of unmet expectations. I try so hard to not have the expectations. It's not that I don't know they love me, or that I need some silly card to tell me. It's just that when everyone else seems to be having these high class meals, fancy gifts, and store bought cards. They are loved and cherished, I can't help it I compare.
Ian's Mother's Day card that we made at Cub Scouts
I try not to, but I do. I even start to think that I want those things. Sean scared me by saying that we should all go out for a nice Brunch in honor of Mother's Day. I was scared because I would not actually want to pay for that. It would literally eat up our entire weeks grocery budget. I heard Ruby asking Sean to take her to the store to buy some flowers for me and I whispered to him to go help her cut me some lilacs off of our tree. I love the smell of lilacs and even more like that they don't cost anything!

On Saturday evening I started to make our traditional Overnight Skiier's Toast for Sunday morning breakfast, boiling eggs for egg salad sandwiches and got out the stuff to marinate my favorite dinner, Broccoli Beef. Sean told me not to, that Sunday was Mother's Day, and I shouldn't have to cook. These were my thoughts exactly, however, I was taking care of it on Saturday so that I would have Sunday off.
On Sunday Sean came down with an awful headache and had some things he need to take care of 45 minutes away. I wanted to have a pity party, unmet expectations. Instead, I tried to focus on how many things I have to be thankful for. How blessed I am to be a mother and get to stay home and raise these children hopefully, to God's glory. I did have a brief episode of sulkiness, but managed to 'Take every thought captive".
Beautiful Flowers Mikaela had delivered to me! 
You see I have learned not to expect. When I do, it comes back to the fact that I want things my way, I want to be recognized. I want people to tell me how great I am, How good of a cook I am, What a wonderful homeschooling mom I am, That I am a good wife, you name it, just focus on me.
Yes, I know, that is not the way it was ever meant to be, or should be. It's just nice to think it might happen sometime. Yet, really I am glad to be able to see more clearly that every aspect of my life should point to my savior.
It really comes back to the sin of pride. My husband is a wonderful man, he is a great provider, patient parent, and diligent worker. However, he is not a man of words. I find it hilarious that there is a stack of Mother's Day cards in his nightstand that he must have purchased at least 4 years ago, and I have yet to receive one of them!
Liberty's Card she made with Ian's help
 At scouts, I came up with a cool pop up card project for the boys to make for their mothers. I painstakingly cut out all the pieces and helped the boys make and address their cards. Then, mailed the cards. Ian was so excited for me to get his card. When it came in the mail he told me I had to wait until Mother's Day to open it! I opened it with much fanfare and told him how much I loved it! He wrote sweet nothings to me. It was really very sweet. I gave him a great big hug and kiss and said to him, that his was the only card I got. At first, he seemed genuinely pleased. Then I noticed the wheels turning and he gathered his little sisters got paper, pens, and scissors. They disappeared into the living room and came back later with these cards.
This, this is what motherhood is all about.  For my youngest son to take the initiative and lead his sisters in this token of love appreciation because he knew how much joy it would bring his mama touched me deeply.
Ruby's card
On Monday, Mikaela had a beautiful bouquet of Daisies and Roses delivered, They came in the prettiest pink vase.  I know how busy she is, and how hard she works for her money. Her sacrificial gift let me know that I matter to her.
Although Mother's Day did not go the way I would have planned, I'm glad it didn't. And I'm glad that I am glad.


Crystal in Lynden said...

I love your post.

Carolynn said...

Thank you Crystal. Trying to keep it real..